Giulia, thank you for such a thoughtful response and sharing your experiences.

The conception of happiness is important, mine has developed a lot, it was once purely equated to debauchery, gluttony or excess. Happiness was roaring with laughter or revelling in excessive consumption. In time, I discovered that happiness is a gentle swelling, perhaps simply a feeling that everything is going to be alright. That feels as elusive, it often feels hard to hold a smile or express that life is good, even though I know these to be true.

It seems you have experienced a lot in life and I agree with your closing line, if we practice and look at what is happening, our chances of glimpsing happiness grow, day by day. Happiness relates to our deeper experience of life, not the jobs, friends and experiences we have.

Take care and have a lovely day 🤗